The Scoop with Tanya Flanagan

Announcer 0:00
This is a KU NV Studios original program.

Wesley Knight 0:04
The content of this program does not reflect the views or opinions of 91.5 Jazz and Moore, the University of Nevada Las Vegas, or the Board of Regents of the Nevada System of Higher Education. Good morning,

Tanya Flanagan 0:20
and thank you for joining me for the scoop with Tanya Flanagan. I'm so happy you decided to wake up and start your day with me here on the scoop, where we talk about life, joy, funny moments, trending topics, and so much more. We promise to keep you in the know and find out what you know. So, let's get started, you Good morning, Las Vegas, and welcome to another edition of The Scoop with me, Tonya Flanagan. I want to thank you for tuning in on this wonderful, beautiful Sunday morning. It's hot. We are headed towards summer, closing out spring, and as I began to prepare to have this conversation this morning, what came to my mind was seasons, and spring and summer are two of my favorite seasons. I love various aspects of the year, and as we were winding down the primary election season, it's just a few days behind us, thinking about the metamorphosis that happens as we're going through different challenges and life, how we respond to those and how they shape who we are. And I reached out to a friend and I said, will you join me in the studio? I'd like to talk about seasons and the impact they have on our lives. So I want to welcome to the show once again the amazing, talented, brilliant Dr. Tony Bond. Good morning.

Toni Bond 1:50
Good morning. Thank you for inviting me back. I never know if I'm going to get another invitation.

Tanya Flanagan 1:56
Oh, I'm glad I got one. Thank you for saying yes, and congratulations. Before we have this conversation, that I hope is fun, interesting, enlightening. You are a newly ordained minister, which I think will add volumes to our discussion today.

Toni Bond 2:14
I am, I am now Reverend Dr.

Tanya Flanagan 2:17
Reverend Dr. The list of accolades that adorn this woman. Folks, let me tell you, the list is long.

Toni Bond 2:25
That's it. I'm done. The list is

Tanya Flanagan 2:27
impressive. I want to talk about reproductive justice. I just want to note it. You are one of the founders of the reproductive justice movement as well. I

Toni Bond 2:35
am

Tanya Flanagan 2:36
so when we talk about quality health care consciousness and awareness around all aspects of women, family. This woman was on the front, on the front lines as a soldier, fighting for women, fighting for families, fighting for awareness, so that people begin to look at it through a compassionate lens, a responsible lens of accountability, so thank you for that.

Toni Bond 3:06
Thank you, thank you.

Tanya Flanagan 3:08
Today we're not, we're not, we've often talked about the reproductive justice component of your life and what you've done there, but today I don't know, I wanted to talk with you, and I guess your ordained minister accomplishment message has been like a cloud and a rainbow over my head that day when I said, hey, come hang out on Sunday morning and let's have a talk, and when I began to look at seasons, seasons of life describes the distinct phases of personal growth, challenges, and experiences we all go through, much like the weather, every season is temporary and brings its own unique environment and opportunities, and so I wanted to kind of look at this conversation of seasons, where we are, what they symbolize, how you see it, and just let the conversation unwind relative to everything, anything happening in our world right now. People often start spring, summer, fall, winter, is how they kind of list them out, and we're closing out spring, the season of sewing, before we go into the season of cultivating to go into the season of harvesting to the season of resting and reflection.

Toni Bond 4:30
Yes,

Tanya Flanagan 4:31
so season of sowing it

Toni Bond 4:34
depends upon, so yes, you have, of course, the seasons, the four seasons, but we're always going through a period, a season in our lives, true, and there's this thinking that, of course, we are living our lives according to the calendar year, right, January through December, so that's how we get those seasons, mm. But a dear friend of mine said something to me when I got divorced, and I got divorced in December of 2018 and we were talking about starting the new year. She said something very profound. She said, "Well, you know, you're newly divorced. January does not have to start your year, you need a respite, you need to recover from this previous season that you have been through, and she said you can start your new season anytime you want to, and I thought, How very profound, so now my new season in my life starts in March, which could kind of coordinate to spring,

Tanya Flanagan 5:47
right? I was about to say, right, that kind of aligns with spring,

Toni Bond 5:50
right, but the whole idea that we don't have to, we don't have to start our beginning right when society tells us we have to start it,

Tanya Flanagan 6:05
and maybe we think we're starting it when society has said, because January is the first month, right, so we start anew, we know fast at the beginning we try to move out the old of what was last year, but in reality, if you look at what I just read, it's an overlapping from winter, so from the end of the year until the beginning of the year, right, that's the rest, but reflection, spring is the beginning,

Toni Bond 6:36
and that's the more metaphysical sense, I mean, because even in the physical sense, given what we've done to the climate, the seasons sometimes don't even match up.

Tanya Flanagan 6:47
So, true, we are definitely in a space right now where they don't matter. I mean, I'm from Arizona originally, and isn't it always summer?

Toni Bond 6:54
Well, well, that, and you have places like Chicago, who's.. I mean, I'm from Chicago, and they say, if you don't like the weather, stick around, it'll change, but it's always been, you don't quite know what to expect in Chicago, but folks in Chicago now are saying, you really don't know what to expect, it could be cold, it could be hot, it could be raining, you just don't know, it's very

Tanya Flanagan 7:20
different everywhere when we start to look at from that perspective. Even in the South, it's very rainy, it's very tumultuous, more tornadoes, just more unrest in the seasons. Here we're surprised when it's not as hot as we think it's going to be, when we think it's going to be hot, we are realizing that it used to get cold. What happened to cold? Like, if you own a coat, you put it on because it matched your outfit, not because it was actually chilly enough outside to warrant the real use of. I remember when it would be 35 degrees or 32 at night or barely 50 during the day, and that constituted a chilly day, because it was a drop from 117 to 50, so in the desert that's a cold day,

Toni Bond 8:17
but the whole concept of seasons in the metaphysical sense, when you said earlier, sometimes we go through challenges, life challenges, and, and sometimes it feels like we're not going to get out of it, it's not going to change, but then life is cyclical, everything changes, and so what may seem like you're stuck in a particular season. I like to a friend, another friend. I think I have some very wise friends.

Tanya Flanagan 8:48
Aren't you fortunate?

Toni Bond 8:49
I am very fortunate. And she just said this the other day. She was talking to another friend of ours who's going through some challenges, life challenges, and she said, think of it like this, that you are in a cocoon and you're a caterpillar, and in that cocoon you're being shaped and formed, and nobody sees what's going on with you in that cocoon, how you were being prepared, you might be going through all sorts of life challenges, right, and you might be getting beat up upon, you may, you know, just by life itself, and, and she said, and then we know out of that cocoon comes the butterfly, and she talked about the symbolism of being in that cocoon and going through for that season and going through life's challenges and being prepared to be the butterfly who then goes out and pollinates, you know. All the trees and the plants and flowers, so sometimes I think when we are in a particular season it feels difficult, it feels challenging, but but if you look at it on a much higher level, we're being prepared for the next step next season of our life,

Tanya Flanagan 10:26
I can 100% relate to that, and I think it's funny too, sometimes when you are going through something, you may or may not correlate it with the time of year that it's happening, but you mentioned the divorce in December, and then the restart for you that now happens in March and spring, and I think that sometimes we don't realize that the challenging periods may correlate to the season that they're associated with, and when you come through on the other side of that journey, you come out of the cocoon, and you are your beautiful butterfly self, recharged, rejuvenated, reborn, refashioned. Maybe it is spring, maybe it is summer, which becomes a season of cultivation, so you are ready to do the pollinating to do the work.

Toni Bond 11:28
Now, sometimes we don't learn the lesson. This is

Tanya Flanagan 11:31
true, and you can be in that cocoon again. I mean, I 100% do believe that if something is given to you and you miss, whether you miss an aspect of it, or you miss all of it. There may be something that you repeat

Toni Bond 11:45
absolutely,

Tanya Flanagan 11:46
and if you are wise enough to slow yourself down when the unpleasant moments of life arrive, and you're not afraid to do the work, where you can come out on the other side of that is unbelievable. I personally, you know, I - we all have gone through, so I too have lived long enough to go through a few things here and there, and learn some different things about myself during those times and those seasons of challenge, whether it was around healthcare, whether it was around personal relationships, and when I say personal relationships, I don't mean dating relationships, I mean like just girlfriend, like personal relationships of people who were important to me, even family, sometimes where you just have to reevaluate and slow down long enough to say, how does this affect me, how is this changing me, what can I take from this and grow even in organizations that you may be affiliated with, where there's work to be done.

Toni Bond 12:47
Do you find, though, that sometimes we fight against being in that season? I'm thinking about

Tanya Flanagan 12:54
absolutely, because you have to face some part of yourself that you may not be ready and willing to take a look in the mirror, and see, so people fight against they have the fear of the unknown, the fear of self discovery. It takes courage in any circumstance to face yourself and to admit. I tell people sometimes I call it a prayer closet, a conversation between you and God, an honest one, where no one else is around, say the thing that is the most frightening thing that you need to have come out of your mouth, which is the most honest statement about how you feel about whatever it is you're going through, and if you can get that out, you can begin to deal with what's challenging you, but if you're afraid to face it, you're pressing it down,

Toni Bond 13:43
right? Right,

Tanya Flanagan 13:45
how are you ever going to get relief and get on the other side of it,

Toni Bond 13:48
right? But that's where faith comes in.

Tanya Flanagan 13:51
It is faith,

Toni Bond 13:52
right?

Tanya Flanagan 13:52
That's why you're in the prayer closet,

Toni Bond 13:54
right? But faith, the

Tanya Flanagan 13:55
size of a grain of mustard seed, sounds so simple all the time. People say, "Oh, you just need faith the size of the grain of a mustard seed, which is as big as a dot a period on a piece of paper, and it really is, but

Toni Bond 14:07
but then the muscles of things hope for

Tanya Flanagan 14:11
evidence of things not seen,

Toni Bond 14:12
absolutely, so the

Tanya Flanagan 14:14
muscle to exercise it, though, is more than what people really, if you've ever been in a space where you were really trying to exercise your faith and lean in and wait patiently for something to transpire, you will understand how it is the biggest muscle you will ever work, and it is not as easy as it may sound.

Toni Bond 14:36
I like to, I liken it to, I was telling my physical therapist, and she's, oh, she's tough, and she was working on my arm. I tore my rotator cuff.

Tanya Flanagan 14:48
Shame on you.

Toni Bond 14:49
I was not trying to tear it.

Tanya Flanagan 14:51
I wonder what the story is behind that post. I'm just kidding. You always have to have a good story when you have injury. There is no good story. You must make a good story. My tip. And dislocated my ankle, and I have three different versions of how I was biking to Andes Mountain when a Puma cat came out of nowhere, and I fell off the bike and rolled down a cliff and broke my leg, and yeah, they had to air back, it was a whole, it's a whole story,

Toni Bond 15:14
I don't, you need something like that, maybe it's the

Tanya Flanagan 15:16
journalist in me, but you need some,

Toni Bond 15:18
all I can say is I took an Uber and I went to reach my backpack, and I heard something pop.

Tanya Flanagan 15:23
Well, that story we're gonna work on, because I also have a kayak in the Mapuche River story. When the kayak capsized, and I hit a boulder in the water, folks, and what you had. Someone told me you needed a good story. I also have, you know, fun story. I tell folks, maybe I made, maybe I was salsa dance, maybe I had too many Pisco sours in Bella Vista, Santiago. They're like, really, I'm like, maybe I was salsa dancing and missed a step. Yeah, at any

Toni Bond 15:52
rate, gotta work your

Tanya Flanagan 15:55
stories there, Dr. Bond.

Toni Bond 15:56
What I was, I liked, I was telling, so she does this shock treatment to my arm, which it hurts like the dickens when it's happening, but it feels so great afterwards, and and what I've come to realize is how we deal with pain, you have to, and I said this to her. She said, 'Does it hurt? I said, 'Yes and no, because what I've come to learn about pain is that you have to live into it. You have to settle yourself into the pain. You have to embrace the pain and sit in it, and then it doesn't hurt as much,

Tanya Flanagan 16:41
it hurts, but you see the reward on the other side of the pain.

Toni Bond 16:45
Well, do

Tanya Flanagan 16:46
you think?

Toni Bond 16:46
No, it's actually about becoming one with the pain. If you can, if you can live into the pain,

Tanya Flanagan 16:53
is that breathing?

Toni Bond 16:55
It could be breathing, but it really is like getting your mind to like become one with the pain.

Tanya Flanagan 17:02
How does that work? I don't.. I can't wrap.. I can't explain

Toni Bond 17:05
it. I can't explain it. I just know that

Tanya Flanagan 17:08
a lot of pain, and I'm trying to really..

Toni Bond 17:10
and you just instead of.. because we clench up and we fight against the pain. I

Tanya Flanagan 17:16
think for me that's the breathing. Then I keep breathing, because when I tighten up it hurts more, but when I breathe through the pain, I'm able to handle the hard moments better. For me, I associate what you're saying with breathing. Do we need to

Toni Bond 17:41
breathe through those difficult periods of our life?

Tanya Flanagan 17:44
You need to remember that those difficult periods through your life aren't going to kill you. I think that's what that breathing is about. It may seem overwhelming, and I have been where be it disappointment in a job, a task, a relationship, and those are things that really, really often derail us, death, loss of someone very special.

Toni Bond 18:08
I really don't have a problem with that.

Tanya Flanagan 18:09
I don't, but there are times, because it's a part of life, it's a season unto itself. But sometimes processing, and when it occurs and happens,

Toni Bond 18:20
yes,

Tanya Flanagan 18:21
and what it removes from your life by no longer having that person, depending on when it occurs, and other elements that may be happening in your life, or things happening around that that occurrence. Like, I lost my mother when I was 29 it felt unfair and too soon, and there were other aspects of, did I leave the job soon enough? Did I get home, even though I saw my mom all the time, and I was always there. Did I not do the one one more thing I could have done? So I had to grapple with that for a little bit. Relationship not working, grandmother dying too soon after my grandfather, different things, realizing that you're not going to die from it, you're going to grow through it, and because of it, I think,

Toni Bond 19:16
yeah, I think it makes you realize that how seasonal your relationships are oftentimes, and it raises for me the importance of always remember, always saying what needs to be said, always saying what needs to be said. Okay, never leaving anything unsaid.

Tanya Flanagan 19:39
That takes courage. There it is again. Courage in this conversation, as we talk about life seasons, and how we talked about sowing spring, we've talked about cultivating, harvesting is the, is that part of harvesting? Maybe never. Leaving things that need to be said unsaid, never missing the opportunity to fully to store up or to how will we look at what, what do you think about that ways you

Toni Bond 20:12
can look at harvesting, it could be harvesting could be looking at the the lessons that you have learned in taking them and putting them into action, it could be

Tanya Flanagan 20:28
it's described as a period of growth, hard work, and overcoming challenges. You are actively building your life, developing your skills, advancing in your career, and dealing with obstacles under the hot sun, symbolically, I guess, at times.

Toni Bond 20:48
Yes, but when we think of harvesting in the physical sense, and I was raised by..

Tanya Flanagan 20:59
oh, wait, that's me, that was cultivating. Let me do harvesting. I was wrong. That's my fault. A time to reap the rewards of your previous efforts,

Toni Bond 21:10
right? It is the

Tanya Flanagan 21:11
characterized, is characterized by enjoying career milestones, raising a family, mentoring others, and experiencing the fruits of your labor, that sounds more like harvesting. I'm sorry,

Toni Bond 21:23
right?

Tanya Flanagan 21:24
I was, I was on cultivating, because it said sun. I said, "Wait a minute, what does the sun have to do with harvest?

Toni Bond 21:28
Yes, so harvesting reminds me of gardening. I came from a matriarchal family, where my grandmother and great aunt had these huge gardens, and I remember us having to go and pick the fruits of that labor, so when I think about harvesting, the definition you gave was absolutely right. We are reaping the fruits of our labor, and but if we bring in a different way of thinking, which is not just how we put what we pour into ourselves, but what are we pouring into others, because this should be this element of we are, we are harvest what we harvest, we are pouring that into others as well,

Tanya Flanagan 22:19
and some ways, I mean, that's how we create community. That's how we absolutely, that's how we protect unity. That's how we prepare,

Toni Bond 22:31
absolutely, to

Tanya Flanagan 22:32
make sure what we've learned, because what is it if the wisdom that you have doesn't, is not passed along, so that it manifests in someone else to continue the legacy, that's true legacy, right.

Toni Bond 22:46
Absolutely, that

Tanya Flanagan 22:48
I think that's one of the most important things,

Toni Bond 22:50
that was that one

Tanya Flanagan 22:51
of the most important things you can do,

Toni Bond 22:54
right? That Sankofa wisdom, being able to look back, because you have to get know where you're going if you don't look back,

Tanya Flanagan 23:01
one of the most important things you can do, and the final space where we also started, is winter, the resting, the season of resting and reflection, a quiet period of introspection, loss, or recovery. It represents a time to slow down, process life events, heal, and prepare for the next new beginning, and I always think about the fact that we stay in a little more. It's cooler outside, the sun goes down earlier, you come home, it's dark, you know? You cozy up,

Toni Bond 23:38
some call it cupping season.

Tanya Flanagan 23:40
Yeah, they do. If you have some cupping to those who are married, good luck, you know. Congratulations to those who are exploring, but it's also the time to get to that part of your journey, or you know, committed companionship.

Toni Bond 23:57
It's also the holiday season too, and it's when you come together with family and friends, and you say

Tanya Flanagan 24:04
thank you, and you look back and be grateful for those who are around you,

Toni Bond 24:07
and you fellowship, and you share food, right? Some gifts,

Tanya Flanagan 24:12
we are so generous in that time, it's like a consciousness of giving period. I

Toni Bond 24:17
always say, I

Tanya Flanagan 24:18
like to see you keep going, but it's such a blossom of sharing.

Toni Bond 24:23
Well, I always say that it's the season of miracles. Anything can happen. Yeah, yeah,

Tanya Flanagan 24:30
I like that. We're in our last five minutes. I told you, folks, she's a very interesting person. If you'd like to learn more about the Reverend Dr. Tony Bond, who I'm talking to this morning, delighted to welcome her back to the show. Thank you once again for being here.

Toni Bond 24:49
Thank you for having me.

Tanya Flanagan 24:50
Take a minute and share your social media handles, how people can learn more about you. Can, of course, just Google this T O N I B O N D, like James, yes. We all enjoy so much the action on screen. I'm a huge Bond fan. I used to hate it when I was a little girl, though. I don't know why. Think maybe I just didn't get it. Anyways, grew up, got it. Like, oh, this is awesome. How do people follow you?

Toni Bond 25:16
People can find me at Dr Tony t1 I Emmas and Mary Bond, like James Bond. Those are all my handles on all of my social media.

Tanya Flanagan 25:30
I wish right now I could just drop in the theme using to a James

Toni Bond 25:33
Bond movie. All right, if folks want to know more about my work, they can find, they can find me at IVRJ, Interfaith Interfaith Voices for Reproductive Justice, triple W dot I V the number 4r j.org

Tanya Flanagan 25:56
So we are headed into the season of cultivating, we wrapping up the season of sewing. What are you excited about?

Toni Bond 26:09
I am excited about going to a vacation.

Tanya Flanagan 26:11
Where are you going? Am I going to be jealous?

Toni Bond 26:13
Yes, you will be. I'm going to Martha's Vineyard.

Tanya Flanagan 26:17
I am jealous. I just wanted to do that, and I haven't. I had a dear friend who said, "Come say that they have a house. She has a house. They

Toni Bond 26:23
should go.

Tanya Flanagan 26:24
That was before. Now she's not as well as she used to be. Bless her heart.

Toni Bond 26:28
It's a lovely place.

Tanya Flanagan 26:30
And I'm part of an organization called the Girlfriends, and they do a weekend in August at Martha's Vineyard. One day I'm going to do that.

Toni Bond 26:40
You should go. It's lovely.

Tanya Flanagan 26:43
I am jealous. You're right. I do want to do that. I do. It is one of the things I want to do.

Toni Bond 26:49
I'm going to rest. And, um, how long

Tanya Flanagan 26:51
will you be there?

Toni Bond 26:52
I will be there for about seven eight days.

Tanya Flanagan 26:57
Okay, that's

Toni Bond 26:58
nice. I am just going to take books and read.

Tanya Flanagan 27:00
I was gonna ask you, what are you reading?

Toni Bond 27:02
A lot of fiction.

Tanya Flanagan 27:04
What I am not, you are reading fiction. I am, I know, right? Even by what I expected.

Toni Bond 27:10
Listen, that's a

Tanya Flanagan 27:11
surprise. The

Toni Bond 27:12
semester is over, my grades are the brain graduation, a little

Tanya Flanagan 27:16
bit. Yes, escaping.

Toni Bond 27:18
I'm going to read fiction. I am going to be in the company of my, my sister girlfriends, and we are going to take turns cooking.

Tanya Flanagan 27:25
Oh, I'm jealous of this trip already,

Toni Bond 27:27
and we're sitting around. That just sounded like life

Tanya Flanagan 27:29
lit, well lived. I am super jealous of this trip already. My friends work so hard. I have the type, I have a bunch of type A personality girlfriends, and nobody turns it off, so we don't know how to slow down. We can barely in the same city, we can barely have dinner. We're just bad. We talk every day, but we don't see each other like we should.

Toni Bond 27:55
So then we

Tanya Flanagan 27:56
support each other in every way that we can, but we just don't slow, everybody has, you know, so busy sowing right to cultivate, to put, to harvest, to pour back into the community, and I love it about us, but I don't know, we need to do better for one another to just have some downtime. I'll take on that challenge. I will take on that challenge for the summer,

Toni Bond 28:21
you have to, with the awards of your, of your fruits

Tanya Flanagan 28:24
of our labor. I will take on that challenge for us for the summer.

Toni Bond 28:28
Good,

Tanya Flanagan 28:29
you inspired me to do that. We won't do it at Marx's Vineyard, but we will do it in good old sunny Las Vegas.

Toni Bond 28:35
There's a lot to do here in Lost. There's

Tanya Flanagan 28:36
a lot to do, City of Entertainment, where fantasies come alive. Makes me want to quote that end of the Pretty Woman movie, where the guy's walking across the screen. What's your dream? Yeah, that anyways. Thank you for coming on and spending some time with me. To

Toni Bond 28:57
the

Tanya Flanagan 28:58
listeners who tune in to 91.5 jazz and more k u n v. Thank you. I hope you have enjoyed the show. Stay safe, stay hydrated, look at your seasons, and enjoy every day and every step along the way. Until next time, have a great week. I want to thank you for tuning into the scoop with me, Tonya Flanagan. And I want to invite you to get social with me. I'm on Facebook and Twitter. My name is my handle, t a n y a f l a n a g a n. You can also find me on Instagram at Tonya Almightys Flanagan. And if you have a thought, an opinion, or a suggestion, don't hesitate to shoot me an email to tonya.flanagan@unlv.edu Thanks again for joining in. Stay safe, and have a great week.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai